I cry until no energy remains.
My eyes close and thoughts quiet.
I slip into a sleepy dreamland.
Just like closing a door on the world and its pain,
I step into this haven.
So calm and relaxed.
The peace brings about true joy.
I am floating through the air,
Over, and through clouds.
I look everywhere and only see blue sky.
I wipe my still damp cheeks
As a beaming smile comes to my face.
I know this place, this dreamland.
All night,
I remain here.
Free, and alive,
The night ends too soon.
I open my eyes to the morning light.
I fight the fact that a new day has come
And I must struggle through it.
Reluctantly, I rise out of my bed,
My doorway to the dreamland.
The motions of the day are more than just motions,
They are horrid struggles that wear me down and break my will.
They do not let me rest or give me peace.
But I fight through it all,
Managing only to appear unenthusiastic.
They don’t understand, they can’t.
To them, daily activities are nothing more than that,
Activities.
To me all of them are pointless and empty so I must force myself to do them
And try to block out negative remarks.
None too soon, but still appreciated, it comes.
My chance to escape comes.
My trip to the dreamland.
It is a time to recover and gather strength and courage.
Yet it is becoming less and less useful
As I am recognizing the pattern,
And realizing it would be so hard to change.
As much as I treasure the dreamland, it cannot be the solution,
Only a temporary ease.
Age 14