So long have I yearned to be free.
These bars,
They do not suit me,
But hold me back.
I look around
Only to see a dreadful pattern of life,
Or rather of behavior,
For it is not living at all.
So consumed by Satan is this small cage.
His servants,
Hate, Anger, Self Pity, Denial,
And Fear,
Lurk in every shadow.
I turn to flee from them
Only to see the bars.
I stretch my wings to battle them,
But the fight is too exhausting
And I cannot fly away.
So I sit on my perch
And close my eyes and ears to the shadows and sounds.
But my heart, I cannot close.
I feel the tension and anticipation
As I sense the shadows close in around me.
I flap my wings so furiously,
But where am I to go?
A caged bird.
So long have I hoped and prayed for the bars to banish.
So long have I exhausted myself fighting the shadows.
I open my eyes and also my ears
To confirm what my heart has felt.
So long had I focused only on bringing light.
I confirmed
Only that nothing had changed.
Down,
Down I fall from my perch,
Weary and broken,
I collapse.
The shadows lunge,
But who am I to fight back?
A caged bird.
Open I am,
In all senses,
Awaiting the misery,
Yet it does not come.
When I give up the battle
And lay vulnerable in every way,
The cage door opens.
I see the outside,
The place I yearned so long to be.
Then
The shadows group together around the cage door,
Forming a barrier with fear at its center.
I flap my wings anxiously,
But there is no way around.
Open to it all,
I fall back into my age-old place on the perch.
Alone and disappointed,
I sit confused and discouraged.
The shadows,
I realize,
Had crept up behind me
And draped over me like a blanket.
A caged bird.
One last time,
That fire from within roars inside of me.
Stretch my wings,
Flap them with my last ounces of strength
And out I fly.
No longer shall I be
A caged bird.
Age 14